A friend of mine told me about an important lesson he learned from his father. I think it is a good lesson for everyone.

My friend’s father was an internationally recognized expert in the science and management of fish, other marine life and their habitats. He literally wrote the book on the subject and was principal author of many scientific studies, reports and papers. Additionally, he was an expert on maritime law as it applies to fisheries. Governmental bodies and private, commercial enterprises employed him to conduct research and make recommendations for sustainability and profitability. He was a big fish in the big pond.

When it was possible, my friend accompanied his father on trips to the sea shore where he played while his father conducted research. On one of these trips, my friend accompanied his father to a remote location on the Atlantic coast. The people who lived in this area made their living from the sea. It was a hardscrabble existence which offered few amenities and fewer opportunities. They were looked down upon as ignorant and backward by people from more affluent and better educated backgrounds. Even as a child, my friend understood that he was supposed to consider these folks as “lesser than.”

My friend was old enough to understand that his father was a highly regarded expert. He anticipated that his father would enlighten the under resourced and backward people of the area… tell them what was what… explain how to do it, that sort of thing. But that didn’t happen. Instead, the renown expert listened carefully to what the local people had to say. He made copious notes. And when he spoke, it was primarily to ask clarifying questions.

Later that evening, my friend asked his father why he had not played the role of famous expert as expected. His father replied, “These people know more than I do. Their families have lived in this area for generations. Everything they have is dependent on their knowledge of the sea. They know more about the local marine environment than anyone else in the world.” He was quite aware that all his degrees and awards did not provide him the same quality of education as did fishing these waters, day in and day out for generations.

This would have been a great life lesson if my friend’s father stopped there. But he didn’t. He went on to say that just because some people are looked down upon because they have few resources and little formal education does not mean they don’t know important things that we don’t know. Important things we need to know to enjoy our best possible lives. When we look down on people and fail to learn from them because of some false notion of superiority, we are practicing willful ignorance. We are given a precious opportunity to learn but are too full of our own ego to accept the knowledge before us. My friend’s father wrapped up the lesson by asking his son, “Who do you think is the stupid one. The person who thinks he knows it all and refuses to learn from others or the person who looks for opportunities to gain knowledge from everyone he meets?” 

My friend’s father is absolutely right. Every farmer, every rancher, every logger, every trucker knows something important you and I don’t know. Every plumber, every electrician, every carpenter, every iron worker knows something important you and I don’t know. Every nurse, every teacher, every therapist, every technician knows something important you and I don’t know. Every pilot, every flight attendant, every air traffic controller, every tour guide knows something important you and I don’t know. Every cop, every firefighter, every medic, every dispatcher, every soldier knows something important you and I don’t know. Every server, every cook, every waiter, every bar tender, every dish washer knows something important you and I don’t know. Every dancer, every painter, every sculptor, every poet, every musician knows something important you and I don’t know. Every preacher, every monk, every rabbi, every imam, every priest knows something important that you and I don’t know. Every person of every race, every nationality, every gender, every ability and every age knows something important you and I don’t know.

“But Earl,” you say, “these are the same people the internet told me to hate. What do they know?” If you have that thought, you are asking the right question with the wrong emphasis. The more skillful question is, “What do they know?” You will never find out if you don’t seek out opportunities to listen to people you might normally avoid. Notice, I did not say “talk to.” I said “listen to.” We are not learning when we are talking. We learn when we do as my friend’s father: listen carefully, make notes and ask clarifying questions. RIP Mr. W.

But don’t take my word for it. Investigate for yourself.

Take care.